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Repeat after me, someone else’s perception is not your reality. Now say this over and over until you actually believe it.

Here’s the thing about the statement, people will say things about you based on their viewpoints or life experiences that aren’t necessarily true. They may form an opinion of you based on erroneous or partial information, believe rumors about you that are untrue or say mean things about you for different reasons such as jealousy, insecurity, selfishness or having a hidden agenda.

Whatever it is, what somebody thinks about you is not your reality. You must have strong self-confidence and values so that you do not let others opinions negatively affect you. You certainly can listen to constructive criticism from those who care about you, and if there are shreds of truth in it, take it for what it’s worth and use it to make yourself a better person. But do not take what other people say about you at face value and base opinions about yourself on it especially if you disagree with what they say or it’s mean spirited in nature. You know yourself better than anyone else, and you shouldn’t be swayed by what others think about you from their vantage point, especially if they’re not coming at it from a place of good. 

One of the most-read articles I’ve written was about mean girls, so I think I struck a chord. That makes me sad because I know so many of us encounter mean girls in our personal and professional lives at every age and stage of our lives.

I find that success brings the haters out the woodworks. Some people you thought were your friends turn out not to be. People are fickle. Nothing in life is certain. I’ve learned the hard way to be very careful who I trust and let my intuition guide the way. I had seen red flags with each of these people that I chose to ignore and it hurt me in the end.

Your high-quality friends are the ones who celebrate with you, rather than let their envy get the best of them. They support you no matter what – good and bad. They are like family.

People are judging and hating on you right now. Some people will like you and then change their mind about you or never like you at all (for no reason) and there’s nothing you can do about it. No amount of people-pleasing or convincing will help. If someone doesn’t like you, there’s no point in trying to convince them to. Why bother – you don’t need that! Just live YOUR life and be unapologetically YOU.

No matter how old you are or what you do, someone will stab you in the back at some point in your life.

I have been betrayed both personally and professionally, and sometimes I’ve seen it coming and other times, it completely caught me off guard. I usually have a strong intuition, but sometimes it kicks in too late, as I am a very trusting and open person.

Unfortunately there are just some people in this world who think that lying, hurting others, causing drama spreading gossip is necessary to get ahead or entertaining. These are dangerous people who you should try and avoid at all costs.

Each of us (I hope) tries to be a good person every day. You show people you are a good person by taking actions consistent with what you define as being a good person.

If I’ve learned anything over the past year, it’s that nothing in life is certain. Plans and life can go awry for reasons out of your control, people change and you just have to go with it and make the best of it.

My life was completely different a year ago. I was in an in-house marketer. I had a lot of friends. I thought I had finally found “the one,” and we had recently moved in together. I had the best dog in the world. I was settled and content (or so I thought). I never imagined I would be where I am today.

But things happen, people change, business needs change, people and pets pass away, a pandemic can happen- nothing is certain. Just look at the world in which we live right now. I had to go with the flow. I had to stop knocking on doors that weren’t meant for me. I had to hit the reset button on my life. I had to lean on others for support. And most of all, I had to harness the power of my intuition to lead me to a better life.